"son, I'd rather you hate me now!"

01

the weekend is the last day of a blockbuster, and my daughter wants to see it very much.

I asked her if she had finished her homework. She said no.

I said, you can't go to the movies until you've finished.

she looks aggrieved: but I can't finish it. I have too much homework.

I told her, first of all, homework is your main business.

secondly, I've been playing all weekend. Who's to blame for not finishing my homework?

just as her father came over and said to one side, forget it if you can't finish it.

Why are you under so much pressure? happiness is more important than anything else. Come on, Dad will take you to the movies.

I stopped them at that time, not because I had too much to do or didn't love my daughter.

now, of course, you can watch movies, you don't have to do homework, and you can be happy. What if you can?

I have an aunt who once asked everyone in the family to help her son, that is, my cousin, find a job.

cousin is very handsome, 1.8 meters tall, sunny temperament, very humorous and easy to get along with, and very smart.

but resumes are given to any company or organization, and it is useless to find someone directly.

because he only has a high school education and does not have any skills, he feels bitter as long as he is allowed to learn something from an early age.

it was nothing when I was a child. Adults are used to it. When they grow up, their peers begin to be independent, and he can no longer sit still.

he even falls in love when it comes to marriage, because he doesn't have a job.

Yes, you can play alone, you don't have to study, you don't have to read, but if you don't have independent skills and the ability to support yourself, how can your dignity, face, and inner expectations of yourself be realized?

A carefree life comes at a price.

born human beings, they all have more or less what Maslow calls "self-realization", which no one can escape.

this is why many adults are more likely to be unhappy when they grow up if they learn less when they are young.

at the annual meeting, when you see those colleagues who are dancing and singing on the stage, you will regret it. I wish I had learned some musical instrument when I was a child, so I could show it now.

when I changed jobs, I saw that many corporate job posters said: fluent in English, listening, speaking, reading and writing. You will be annoyed why my English is so poor! Otherwise, with this skill alone, the salary may be thousands higher.

when you can only do the most basic and unvaluable work, and you can only get a salary of two or three thousand a month, you will be helpless. If I have a skill certificate with a higher gold content, it will be the same hardship, but it will get more money.

such regrets and regrets will fill your life, how can one be happy?

the so-called "let the child have a good future, rich, in addition to buy for the child, give enough love in spirit, the most important thing is to give the child the most correct, and even some strict supervision."

only adults know that real happiness in life is not given to you by others, but earned by yourself.

if you don't tell your children this, how will they know?

02

Happy education is now especially advocated. For many children, happiness means playing games, playing games with classmates and watching TV endlessly.

I have read a saying that parents always like to say that even if you are a cleaner, you have to be a happy cleaner.

but if you are forced to be a cleaner because you are not studying, how can you be happy?

long Yingtai has a saying very well:

when your work gives you time and does not deprive you of your life, you will have dignity; a sense of achievement and dignity will give you happiness. "

Yes, reading gives you more freedom and choice, allows you to see a bigger world and has a wider space.

most of the children are born in ordinary families, not the second generation of celebrities, no tuhao-like life, and parents who call the wind and rain.

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most children have to study hard, go through countless days and nights like cantilevers, squeeze onto the single-log bridge of the college entrance examination, and finally have a decent life.

and this process, no matter how good the children's material conditions, is inevitable.

playing games and watching TV is just for entertainment.

but only through one's own efforts, self-discipline, hard work and a sense of achievement can one call happiness and happiness.

03

I have a neighbor sister who graduated from Peking University and worked as an exchange student at Harvard. After graduation, she went to study in the United States and now works in the United Nations.

on one occasion, her daughter asked her how she could work at the United Nations.

the neighbor's sister said, "just study hard."

my daughter skimmed her lips, but she studied too hard.

the neighbor sister told a story about her. When she was a child, the conditions of her family were actually very poor, and her parents were both laid off, so they went to set up a breakfast stand and sell soy milk Youtiao.

although her parents are too busy to control her, they still provide her with a good learning environment and often tell her to study hard.

Children always disapprove of such teachings.

even for a while, she really didn't want to study and cried out because it was too hard to go to school.

I have to get up in the morning, do exercises and do papers endlessly, and my heart beats when I take exams and other scores.

her father is also a god-man.

if you don't want to go to school, you don't want to go to school. You just ask the school for a week.If you don't want to go to school, you have something to do, so come and sell breakfast with us.

she agreed.

A week later, I was crying to go to school.

because selling breakfast is much harder than going to school.

No matter how cold it is outside, you have to climb out of bed at four o'clock;

although it is just a stall, the waist is sore when you move the food pots and pans up and down;

it's easy to open up, and you have to wash the dishes for the guests. the water is so cold that it hurts to wash a pair of chopsticks.

the most fucked up thing comes, even if you pay so much and struggle for so long, the money you finally receive is just a few crumpled dollars.

she said: I may never forget that when I made two yuan in my hand for the first time, I was not elated at all, but depressed, deeply depressed.

I worked so hard and suffered so much that all I got was only two yuan, which was not enough to buy a better automatic pen by myself.

her father told her that you don't have to study or study, but that's what you want to live in the future.

she understands that it is hard and tiring to do everything, but some hardship and tiredness can make you see the hope and the end, and even give you a sense of achievement and satisfaction.

but some bitterness and tiredness bring you nothing but endless doubts about yourself and resentment towards life.

doing exercises and memorizing words can make you feel proud and proud of yourself when you suddenly realize it, but selling breakfast is more about your heartache and helplessness.

studying can take you to Beijing, the United States, and the United Nations; if you don't study, you may only be able to take you from one street to another.

04

Russell said that life should be like a river, narrow at the beginning, sandwiched between the two banks, the river rushing and roaring, flowing over the boulders and flying down the cliff.

later, the river gradually widens, the two sides are farther and farther away, and the river flows more gently, and finally flows into the sea and integrates with the sea water.

writer Su Xin also said such a paragraph:

son, I also know that you study hard and do not require you to be number one, but you should spare no effort at the age when you should work hard.

if you choose mediocrity and inaction at the age when you should work hard, but with the excuse of mediocrity and value, I'm sure you will regret it in the future, but you won't be able to say it.

walk through the narrowest place, the hardships you have suffered, the nights you have survived, the problems you have done, and the words you have memorized will pave a wide road that will take you to where you want to go.