When the wind and water rise, it all depends on yourself.

as the saying goes:

the words are not rough. No one will always give you support and help you unconditionally.

relying on parents, friends and relationships are only temporary. They can be relied on for a while, but not for a lifetime.

parents will grow old eventually, relatives can't be around forever, and friends can't help them all the time.

finally found that you are the only one you can rely on for the rest of your life.

01

count on others, and you lose

there is a saying: "those who cannot obey their own orders must take orders from others."

if you rely on and depend on others, you have to look at others' faces, take orders from others in everything, and be controlled by others everywhere. How can you control your own destiny?

there is a long way to go in life. If you always rely on others and pin all your hopes on others, you will not be able to get a real sense of security and really have the life you want.

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the female writer Su Qing once obeyed the arranged marriage and was confined to the family early.

in order to take care of the family, get pregnant and have children, she gave up her college studies and dropped out of school to raise the baby at home.

in order to give birth to a son, she not only gave birth to four children, but also obeyed her mother-in-law to stop breast-feeding from the month, just to resume her period and get pregnant as soon as possible.

in order to save her family, she repeatedly compromised and forgave her husband Li Qin for having an affair.

until the mistress was pregnant and her husband slapped her, she finally woke up the ups and downs of her ten-year marriage, and she finally realized that there will never be happiness if you rely on others.

after the divorce, she began to find herself, to write again, and to make a living with her talents and words.

after writing "Ten years of Marriage", she became famous in the first world war, turned gorgeously, and quickly became a hot best-selling writer in the literary world in Shanghai.

as Wang Guozhen said:

instead of relying on others, it is better to rely on your own abilities. Only when you are strong can you win the respect of others and get a real sense of security.

02

relying on yourself is the king's way

there is a good line in "the first half of my life":

most of us are ordinary people, without congenital superior family circumstances, no brilliant and illustrious background,

on the long road of life, we can only walk out of the Yangguan road by working hard, opening up roads, building bridges over rivers, and stepping out one step at a time.

at this time last year, my friend Xiaonan was the happiest, and she was finally admitted by the coveted company. But she found that a colleague in the department came in by family connections and was not qualified in terms of the level of work.

in addition to repeatedly dragging her feet in the team and tense relationship with the team, her work attitude is also very lazy. Every time she encounters a new project, she comes to a dead end and withdraws in a few days.

just because she has this relationship, she won't be fired.

A year has passed, Xiaonan got a promotion and a raise because of hard work, while that colleague is still standing still.

I heard Xiaonan say that later, that colleague was too lazy to bother about, so he took the initiative to apply and transfer to a relatively simple and leisure job.

Destiny is achieved step by step by oneself.

if you want to be appreciated, you must first improve your ability; if you want to be trusted, you must be honest; if you want to be respected, you must learn self-respect.

although many people are born ordinary, they do not complain about others, but stand on their own feet, strive to take every step, and live a wonderful life on their own.

instead of pinning hopes on others, spend more time investing in yourself and making yourself independent and strong.

relying on yourself is the king.

03

people have to fulfill themselves

Zhang ailing said in "half Life":

in fact,

is not just a middle-aged person. When you experience more, you will gradually understand that everyone has his own troubles, every family has their own difficulties, and it is their duty for others to help you, but not to help you.

the more painful you are, the more you need to know how to save yourself.

difficulties can only grow by solving difficulties on their own; only by earning money on their own can they have the strength to face life; families can only be happy by running their own business; and only by their own experiences, joys and sorrows, is a unique life of their own.

in Farewell my Concubine, Xiaodou's master said to them:

I think deeply that the good life has always been accomplished by ourselves, and it is useless to rely on anyone else.

how hard you work, how wonderful your life will be. In the end, it is always you who decide what kind of life you can live.

A person's greatest backing is himself; a person's greatest honor is himself.

Yu Hua said:

Yu Hua said:

Yu Hua said:

it's all on your own.